With all the good there's also the bad...
Last week, my doctor told me I had lupus.
While I have to take additional blood tests this week to verify, the prognosis makes sense.
Honestly, I’m still not really sure what to do with this information. On one hand, my doctor said not to worry about it. It’s manageable. On the other hand, it’s fucking lupus. The thing that’s thrown around nonchalantly on House. The thing there’s no cure for. The word itself scares me.
That being said, it explains a lot over the years. The extreme fatigue, breathing pains (pleurisy), hand cramping in the morning, hair shedding, and easy bruising (hey Grace, remember that large black bruise on my leg in Vegas?).
You may say, “Liezl, stop being a paranoid goddamn idiot, everyone suffers those things.” Well, I’m not an active person. I shouldn’t just have pains that last for days from doing nothing… and sure there’s normal hair shedding, and then there’s losing about 40% of your hair over the course of a year.
It’s a lot to take in, and if I’ve seemed off this past week, it’s because I’ve pretty much been a depressed, physical and emotional wreck this past week keeping it to myself, so I’ll just leave it here.
I’m sick.