So I have a history of Sleep Paralysis. It doesn’t happen very often these days, but I did get them fairly frequently in high school… just about the time I was diagnosed with your classic aura inducing migraine.

In a nutshell, it’s when your brain wakes up before your body does. You’re fully awake, but you can’t move or speak. It feels like some invisible being is holding you down. Occurrences are also paired with buzzing sounds, crazy hallucinations and lucid dreaming.

Speaking of which, the last fairly lucid dream I had just happened last week. It involved dress shopping with Oprah. When I didn’t agree with her dress choices, she replied with “I’m Oprah, I can make them work.”

To which I thought to myself,“Man, even in this dream, Oprah’s a cocky asshole.”